If it's that noisy marmot family making all the racket I'm going to "accidentally" kick some dirt into the burrow.....seems like there's always another one poking his or head out. They get on my nerves so; all that loud whistling. Worse than sailors in a port, or so Grandpa Chamois says (but how would he know?)
Wait, that's no marmot family. Just heard a loud "clunk". Must have been that pesky Lammergeier, always dropping bones from the sky. Almost hit me in the head once, the inconsiderate bird. And that silly little tuft of hair under its beak... so uncouth.
Nah, can't be that bearded dummy. Too much noise now, too much huffing and puffing. Perhaps it's a brown bear. I've never seen one but I hear tell there are a few in these hills. Grandpa says they were all gone, and then someone got the bright idea to move some in from a place called Slovenia. Where the heck is that? They should have left good enough alone -- us grass eaters don't need to have some big old brown fuzzball leaving their muddy paw prints everywhere.
Wait, I see something now. It's a line of humans snaking up the hill!! What the heck are they doing up way up here. They are all men, and that huffing and puffing, well, no wonder, they all look a bit long in the tooth. All old enough to be Grandpas, the bunch of them I bet. No wonder why there was so much wheezing. And that clunk -- must have been one of them fell over. Wonder whether they left him behind. No matter, the Griffon vultures will clean up....
Scott Fertig, Fauna Correspondent.